Voyage into the Deep

Our Story - 2500 A.D.

2007-07-20T03:07:00.000-04:00

Imagine year 2500. Global warming is an accepted and apparent phenomenon. Snow peaks have melted, the sea has gulped down major chunks of land masses... but we, the human race, have managed to race on. Some live in cities floating on water, while others have built their own air bubble city within the heart of an ocean. Other avenues of habitat are also being pursued, deep in space. Our space stations already have people settling there, as well as on the Moon. Adaptation was never our weakness. We are truly intelligent, innovative, and technologically advanced.

One fine day, the astronauts on a space cruiser make an alarming discovery. On the far side of a neighboring galaxy, we have found positive signs of life on a remote planet, much like our Earth. Thrilled at this opportunity of finding alternative habitat, our world is united in sending both research scientists and military troops to face the unknown and explore all possibilities.

Innumerable space-pods (spaceships as big as cities) from all over the earth are immediately deployed to orbit this far away planet. The idea is to study them from space and then land there to explore further. In due time our pods cast huge shadows on the face of the new planet we call Xenon. The initial research on the atmosphere confirm 99.999% match with that of Earth some 100 million years ago. So we prepare to land our military troops to scout Xenon for native life forms.

Not sure of what the atmosphere holds for us, we land with extreme caution wearing gas masks with oxygen pipes and body armors. As we land, we are greeted with lush green all around with blue waters and clear sky lit up by Xenon's primary star, the Neosis. We feel ecstatic upon our findings that seem to promise our race a second chance at a new home. As our troops roam the land, they make sudden contact with what is the first sighting of some intelligent life form on Xenon. They look like some form of apes with horse like legs. And they communicate with each other in some native language.

As we approach them, the Xenonians fall back, apprehensive and unsure of our intentions. It was as if without being told they could feel that we were there to claim their home as our own. They seem primitive in terms of our technology and we are not sure as to their level of intelligence. In order to make contact, our troops approach slowly but firmly. However the Xenonians felt threatened and without any warning fall back to their form of defense and start attacking us with their form of weaponry. Startled by the sudden attack from Xenoians, our troops open fire. Our laser guns prove far superior to their poisened needle like arrows and darts. Some of them fall to the ground as others retreat quietly in shadows.

We are not too sure as to what just happened. We carefully approach the fallen Xenonians and investigate their belongings. Amongst many things, we find a fat book made of some leaf like paper with lots of symbols and illustrations. We recover that and a few other things back to our space-pod for further scrutiny and analysis. After feeding the symbols through our super atomic computers, we quickly decipher what story the book has to tell. And here is what it said.

Beware friends. We must always be prepared. There is always the possibility of intelligent life out there besides ourselves. They may be more advanced than we are and they may come in peace or war. There might be races out there who travel from planet to planet, staying there only until they suck all the life and resources out of it. And then they move on, in search of other planets like ours. If the day should come, that we see dark shadows clouding our skies, and strange creatures with tentacles roaming our lands with the club of death in their hands, we can only be sure of one thing: the aliens have invaded.

Playing catch...

2006-07-19T10:37:00.000-04:00

I read something on my dear friend Satyaki Basu's
website. I am quoting it out here too.

-Quote-
"If a tree falls in the forest, and there is no one around to hear it, does it make a sound?"

I thought about the quote all evening. I imagined baseball-shaped molecules moving in compressional waves across an empty forest, never being acknowledged. I debated alone in bed until, finally, understanding dawned... It's not about matter or sound waves or ears or trees. Its a statement about something much more important: Our reality.

Anything that exists may as well not, if there is nothing but that entity acting as witness to the existence.

We're nothing if we're not relating to some one on some level. My thoughts, remaining mine alone, are but smoke; they make their insignificant appearance and then dissipate into nihility.

So, here, is my first attempt at throwing a few baseballs. Hope someone's out there with a mitt...
-Unquote-

I do not wish to add anymore to this and mess with its elegance. I just happened to have a mitt and I caught it.. and then thought of echoing it along...

How much is 6.12 MB ??

2006-06-25T01:15:00.000-04:00

Considering the fact that you can get memory cards of the order of few GBs (1 GB = 1024MB) nowadays that are no bigger than a quarter (or say 2 sq. inches) and can cost you somewhere around $50 or less, I would say 6.12 MB is most trivial.

Why am I rambling about memory size suddenly at 1:30 am in the night? The fact that I had a margarita an hour back has nothing to do with this :) I am in the process of writing my PhD thesis and just now I compiled my first draft in Latex. It came to about 130 pages with lots of tables and figures and text. I was about to mail myself a copy for backup when I saw the size of the entire directory on disk: 6.12 MB !

So asked again: How much is 6.12 MB ??

Its 5 straight years of toiling, learning, struggling, pondering, discipline and the eventual feeling of sweet satisfaction of achieving something that has changed me as a person forever.

And now I shall go to sleep...

Faith

2006-06-19T14:30:00.000-04:00

Last 2 months have been literally exhausting. Both physically and emotionally. I was engaged in the task of trying to find a place for myself in the industry after I graduate with my PhD :)

Although at start things seemed pretty difficult, somehow with time they seemed to sort themselves out. Ofcourse I had to keep making my own sincere efforts. Still, it is quite amusing how at times when I could not see forward at all, a path seemed to form just for me out of nowhere.

All this just re-established my faith in life in all its full glory. It also reminded me of the 2 most beautiful expressions of faith I have ever heard:

1. Faith doesnt help you walk around walls. It walks you through them.

2. When you are standing at the edge of a cliff, and you need to put your best foot forward, if you have faith, you will know that only 2 things can happen:

Either you will find ground beneath your feet.

Or, you will learn to fly.

Living a dream

2006-05-27T13:06:00.000-04:00

Most of us hope to live and then live to dream. I am not going to comment on its appropriateness, but rather on its effect on our daily lives. Nothing wrong in particular with dreaming, and dreaming big. Unless you dream and have goals you may find it hard to motivate yourself to achieve them in your lives. However, the caveat is to remember to live your life and not the dream itself. Let me explain.

Recently I started reading a very interesting spritual guide Power of Now. I was caught on to nice thing they say in there about our minds. According the author Eckhart Tolle, our mind is an instrument of our "self" that needs the concept of time to survive. Our mind does not grasp the concept of "now", but only dwells in the past or future. Even if its the immediate past or the immediate future. Check it out yourself. Stop reading this post for a minute and try to observe your own thoughts. Unless your mind is complete blank, what else are you thinking about? How you need to do this today and that tommorrow? Or how that thing went good yesterday and how that someone was supposed to call but didnt? Did you in contrast realize that right at this moment, you are sitting infront of a computer reading this blog and if you are not doing anything else, the only thing you could have thought about is the screen you are looking at, or sounds around you at present, or something like that? But our mind likes to wander doesnt it? Its like while you read this you are forcing it to read and interpret what I write, and as soon as you stop reading, it starts chattering away to glory about how things were in the "now" that is gone, or how they might be in the "now" that is to come, but never once pondering upon the "now" that is.

So in effect, our whole concept of our lives sometimes is nothing but what we want to do and where we want to be, and seldom about who we are and where we are at present. And the funny thing is that while we are travelling tired on the road, thinking about how when we get home we are going to have a nice cup of coffee and relax and enjoy, we actually start enjoying this thought of the future by itself. And remarkably when the actual coffee time comes, except for a fleeting feeling of pleasure, our mind might once again be racing us to maybe where we are going out for a nice dinner next and we start enjoying that thought instead. So it seems like we seem to enjoy our thoughts of what will be, much more profoundly and with greater duration than when the things actually happen. The same thing can happen with adverse thoughts and fear. When something goes wrong in our lives, and we are tensed and worried, we spend more time petrified and dreaming about the million ways it may go wrong and dying multiple times over, even before the thing really happens.

So where did our life go? Are we even alive for real or like in the movie Matrix, just living in a constant dream? Our life is built by nothing but this continuous sense of "now". Think. Will you ever be able to do something in the past? or in the future? No. Whatever has been done in the past, you did it in the "now" that was, and in future you will do in the "now" that will be. But this "now" was always with you and will always be.. for you to live your entire life in it and with it.

The author said a nice thing to the effect of: Go ask a plant or a dog.. what time is it? They will say, what do you mean what time is it? Its now ofcourse... what else can it be?

Anti Reservation 2006 - Please sign the Petition

2006-05-19T09:40:00.000-04:00

I have just read and signed the online petition:

Anti Reservation, 2006

I personally agree with what this petition says, and I think any educated Indian will agree, too. If you can spare a moment, please take a look, and consider signing yourself.

Please read and learn more about the Youth for Equality student body.

Critical Issue -- Please spread the word for YFE

2006-05-19T09:37:00.000-04:00

I am posting on behalf of my friend's mother:

Picture from the Mid-Day website

2 months back 'Rang de Basanti' started a fire – a fire which has enabled people to stand up for themselves and be heard. The current fire setting the country ablaze if of reservations and the media is having a field time covering it day in and day out for the past couple of days. However, there is yet much which remains uncovered by media.

It invariably so happens that most of us 'educated well-meaning' people feel strongly for/against an issue but never actually get down to doing anything about it, which enables our great politicians to play their filthy games and have their way by playing mind games on the unthinking gullible ones. The reservation policy is, quite
evidently, a perfect example of the same. I dont think i need to emphasise how unnecessary it is to have reservations at post-graduate levels...or for that matter even at graduate levels. As a professor, i can see the adverse effects of such a policy in the field of education (reservations for teachers).

Youth for Equality is group of students all over the country who have taken it upon themselves to fight for this cause. The stand that these brave kids have taken is well justified. They are not against the so-called backward castes at all. If only the government would take some time and actually LISTEN to what they have to say, it would become obvious that they have a valid point. Reservations should be brought in at primary level if true upliftment of the society is desired. By bringing in 50% reservations at PG level right before election time, the govt is seeing nothing but vote banks in the people.

The only problem with Rang de Basanti was its end. Though it seemed right on screen, in reality it is not feasible. Dharnas, morachas and even hunger strikes are resorted to by almost everyone now – but does it have any effect? I dont kno what the solution of this situation is, but i do kno that now is the time for all of us who have an opinion to stand up, get out and support these kids in their endeavour. Please spread the word and do all possible in your capacity.

Myths about Astrology - Part Deux

2006-04-23T12:01:00.000-04:00

True, everywhere you look, all the big blockbusters are coming out with newer and newer sequels... Basic Instinct, Superman, Mission Impossible... just to name a few. The harbingers of Summer :) So I thought to myself... why not make "Part 2" of the very first Blog I ever wrote? The very reason I had started this voyage at one point of time. But I must confess :) It also had the added support of some fresh point of view on the topic.

In recent times, a particular sage named Guru Ramdev with his
Yoga related fitenss programme is rapidly gaining popularity with the masses in India. He is telecasting live shows on spiritual TV channels such as Aastha, Sanskar, Sadhana, God and Q TV. He is also in the process of setting up Yoga Camps in many places, and intends to build and operate out of a new institution called Patanjali Yogapith in Haryana. His yogic principles are founded on Patanjali Yoga.

Now, neither this post, nor my previous one, has anything to do directly with Guru Ramdev or his yogic teachings. It does however deal with some comments he made about "Janma Kundali" (natal charts) that shed new light on the topic of my previous post. My father happened to catch these comments on TV and was responsible for bringing my attention to them.

According to Guru Ramdev, the "applicablity" of Janma Kundali is questionable even if the main concept is not, just because of the uncertainty in one of the concept's fundamental assumption. Typically a Janma Kundali, or Natal Chart is designed based on the Time and Place of Birth. It then elaborates on the position of the planetary bodies at that Time and their gravitational effect on that Place, which is seen as a primary influence on the life-long circumstances of a person. Even if one does not argue the science behind this theory, the fact still remains that you assume complete knowledge about Time and Place of Birth, the founding pillars of this Chart design. Although Place of Birth is seldom disputed, the Time of Birth is highly debatable. Not only is it highly likely to make an error in timing the "apparent" birth of a person for reasons such as clocks showing incorrect time, medical complications at the time causing distractions in noting the time, etc, the main question still remains: "when do you think you were actually born?"

According to Guru Ramdev, "prana" (soul) takes birth in the mother's womb. As such, our "birth" occurs with our independent "sattwa" (existence). Even biologically, we take full form and shape within the womb before we are brought out in the open. And what we end up timing is that "moment of liberation". So going by the science of natal charts, one must consider the time of "actual" birth, from which time it is possible for the individual to be affected by the planets, and not merely bank it on the time of delivery. And I hope I need not mention anything special to indicate the complexity of determining this "actual" Time of Birth.

Thus, people who believe strongly in the applications of the science of astrology shall forever run the risk of interpreting someone incorrectly based on his/her natal charts that in all possibility may be founded on incorrect information. And these interpretations often lead to unfortunate decisions followed by similar actions. Here lies the gravest consequence of one of the biggest myths of our times.

Saved by shackles

2006-04-13T10:58:00.000-04:00

Most of us may have at one point or another felt the fear of unknown. Some of us choose not to meddle with what is less known... while some prove brave enough to get out there and expand their horizons. But even then.. there is this limit... for each of us.. beyond which we would choose not to wander. This is our self-made barrier for protection. Our mental solace... within which we cherish the comfort of our own knowledge.

I do not have anything to say about the existence of this wall specifically. What I do wish to comment about here is people's usual denial of what lies beyond. Its one thing to not know something... but quite another to believe what you do not know can never exist... not in your world.. not anywhere else. This is what troubles me. And when people with different levels of knowledge interact, this is often the major source of conflict. The one more blessed with ignorance shall try hard to hold ground, while the other tries to move it from beneath their feet.

I am hoping you are all nodding your head and are on the same page with me so far (assuming u did not get bored and clicked out of my blog!).. but read on.

Normally, being the one on the path to acquire knowledge.. and more of it.. I would naturally favour the one with a broader perspective in such conflicts. Heck, I even believe strongly in: "If you have the ability, you have the responsibility". No, its not a quote.. just something I made up myself.. rhymes well and has a meaning strong enough to merit its own post in this blog. Neverthless, in short it means I believe that if anyone has the luxury of enjoying a special capability, it is his moral responsibilty to share it for greater good whenever the opportunity arises.

Going by this belief, I would think that if someone has more knowledge, its his moral responsibility to impart them within the less fortunate. I would even argue that the people who do not yet know.. are missing out on things that lie far beyond their walls of safety. But here is what I have realised over time. This sense or awareness of ability or capability.. to break one's wall of apprehension and move forward... needs to be self-realised and cannot be preached. And all for a good reason.

Remember that I said that no matter who you are, most probably you too have a wall somewhere... even if its very very far as compared to others. So while you take the solemn oath to free the minds of others... to help them break the shackles.. you forget that you are only inviting them into a larger cell... thats all. Moreover, although it may seem that helping someone overcome that wall is enough... your duty towards him/her does not stop there. For a person being forced to scale the wall... the bigger world is still going to be largely unknown. And since that person did not climb over in his/her free will... you.. their messiah.. would need to keep holding their hand for long after.

On the other hand, when someone crosses over by himself or herself, it not only indicates his/her free will to come out, but also means that this person is ready.. to battle the uncertainties that await him/her initially in the newer world. So it does not fare well to look at someone less informed and feel pity for the things you think that person is missing, because to miss them that person needs to want them in the first place.. and if he/she doesnt even know about them, its quite possible for them to be happy without. It reminds me of a cocoon and how you cannot force a catterpillar out of it and expect it to turn into a butterfly.. it does do that.. but when its finally ready.. in its own sweet time. Meanwhile, that cocoon serves to protect and nourish its existence and we know that its quite alright to let it be that way.

So unless you are ready to take full responsibility for the entire act.. when in any moral conflict with someone less kowledgeable than you, remember that you are better off letting them live happily... safe within their shackles... till its time for them to come out.. and at that point in time... you can go ahead and help them through.. to turn into that beautiful butterfly they anyway will be.

Where your true strength lies...

2006-04-09T02:31:00.000-04:00

Sometimes u cannot help it... you just stand there... as you see yourself fall... for you are not in control. You feel you could have soared high... right above all that is lurking infront, but alas... this time you are not playing alone... and the new rule is that of the weakest link. So you just stand there feeling helpless. It's so hard to accept any kind of defeat, specially when you feel you are better than that, but now you are a team player. And the only way to win is to do it together. So yes, if you choose to be in the team, you need to accept this state of affair and wait for the day that you can all work together... to lift off... over all that stands in our way.

And till then, you need to stand strong... by all who need you there... through all that may hit you in the face.

And now how I wish such a tommorrow comes. Soon.

A few good words...

2006-03-24T20:01:00.000-05:00

With reference to a post on a friend's blog, I noticed that two very prominent words seem to start with the same sound in almost all languages.

1. "Mother" starts with the "M" sound

2. "No" starts with the "N" sound

I am not really listing the languages that conform to this... but you can easily verify the popularity of this phenomenon.

Instead I am putting forth my take on how this might have come to be, and shall be eager to know about the reader's point of view.

The "N" sound is the most instinctive sound that we usually make to express displeasure, discomfort, irritation, etc. Its not even a word. If you are concentrating and I disturb you, instead of saying something you may actually make that "N" sound which would tell me clearly that I am not wanted there :) So maybe thats got somthing to do with the "No" word ?

And the "M" sound... is it because when babies cry after being born, they have that nasal tone which sounds like a "waaaannnh" and also may resemble "M" ? This is kinda far fetched I know... but just seems so strange that almost everywhere in the world mothers would have a similar sounding name to describe their role in our lives!

down memory lane...

2006-03-06T09:58:00.000-05:00

just posted a few childhood snaps on my other blog

Your sorrow unmasked...

2006-02-14T03:24:00.000-05:00

From dawn to dusk
You wear a mask
Watching over your shoulder

You dare not pause
Your life's a clause
Can be taken by a thunder

You're always alert
Two minds apart
Breathing from down under

Caught in a maze
Covered by haze
Survival is a wonder

As the day goes by
Life runs you dry
Sorrow eats your heart

Till night holds u dear
And you find me near
Gently caressing your hair

You let go of it all
Dont mind if you fall
Knowing I am there

You know I'm your boy
Your only joy...
Your sorrow unmasked.

Feeling blue...

2006-02-12T19:21:00.001-05:00

Drops of golden sun every where,
Your daily quota of breathing fresh air,

Yummy food as you sit down for lunch,
Night outs with friends in a bunch,

Your teaher's wise words that see you through,
Your loving pet sticking to you like a glue,

Growing up with a room you can call your own,
Wearing that first shirt that your dad had worn,

A whole day of picnic with your family involved,
Your mom helping you getting your problems solved,

Your younger sibling bugging you the most,
Your best friend raising you a toast,

Your parent's touch with the magic to soften,
Are few things... taken for granted most often.

Goodness gracious...

2006-02-01T15:39:00.000-05:00

Recently, my car's side view mirror got cracked and needed to be fixed. I took it to a collision shop that had previously worked on my car, and hence the owner Jason, remembered my car (even if he didn’t remember me) just because its one amongst two metallic gold colored cougars in the whole of buffalo NY! Jason took one quick look at it and said that if I left the car with him for an hour he could check to see if he could just fix it by putting it back or gluing it. He also informed me that he won’t charge me anything for a simple thing like that.

Now, being a long standing and frequent victim of extortion of all sorts in my own country, such a notion of "free service" is as alien to me as I am to this country. So naturally I mumbled something to the effect of "That’s ridiculous. Of course I will pay you something for your time... however insignificant" ... in an effort to maybe rationalize his act of sudden kindness.

After an hour, he informed me that the mirror couldn’t be fixed and that I should get it replaced. A new mirror he showed me in the book was listed at $142 for my car's year, make and model. He once again said that he will not charge me anything for labor since it was not a big deal to put the new mirror on. So I asked him to order the new mirror for me.

On my way back, I tried to push the old mirror in place so that I could at least use it till it got replaced. To my surprise, it snapped into place, and although the plastic around was a bit cracked, it held more or less firmly in place. Now I felt a bit itchy. Did Jason really try to fix it at all? Or did he just say that it cant be fixed so that he can get me to replace it with a new one? Or was he telling the truth that he didn't know how long the mirror would stay in place even if it was pushed into place like I did?

Anyhow, I planned on going ahead with the mirror change because I didn’t want to take a chance with it later. But it went on bothering me a bit, because I guess I was frantically looking for a reason for Jason's willingness to ease off on the labor charges. He was supposed to get the mirror 2 days later, and then he said he would need to paint the mirror to match my car's color (more labor!!) and then he would dry it. So I was supposed to go back in 3 days to get it put on.

On my way to get the car fixed, suddenly it struck me. What about the old mirror? The mirror was still fine.. so was Jason going to keep it and sell it by himself? So I made it a point to ask him about it.. and was hoping that he doesn’t add labor for all the painting and all. I reached the shop with my head full of skepticism.

Jason greets me "Hey buddy... the mirror is all painted and set to go... and I shall leave your old mirror in the back seat... that mirror portion is still fine.. so you should hang on to it... and its $142 if you pay in cash... by credit I have to add tax.."

Somehow... without me even saying anything all my doubts were trashed out the window. I left the car for an hour to get fixed and later paid him in cash and drove out. As I was driving to school, I was wondering to myself... is it really that difficult for me to accept that someone out there can still be nice and kind... without having any ulterior motive? Or was it the world around us that makes us tumble so often that we become wary of goodness itself?? Oh my goodness...

Pay it forward

2006-01-18T22:40:00.000-05:00

This is a short post about the idea in Catherine Ryan Hyde's book "Pay it Forward" which also got made into a movie by the same name. In this movie, Haley Joel Osment plays a small kid (Trevor McKinney) going to school. Kevin Spacey, who plays his school social science teacher asks the class to come up with ideas that can have an effect on entire mankind, and then also put it into action.

Trevor in the movie thinks that if he is able to do something really good to help 3 people in the world, and if all those people instead of paying it back to him went on to each pay the favor forward to 3 people who really needed them, then in a short while the number of people who would feel indebted to a stranger would grow exponentially. If this urge to keep paying it forward survives, it could reform entire mankind in a very efficient yet simple manner.

I liked the cast, the plot, and the very sensitive way the film was shot. In all it was thought provoking. And then while I was wondering I realized that entire nature including all the animals and plants (including mankind ofcourse) has already been doing something, and shall continue do that same thing, that reflects this very notion of "Paying it Forward".

It is the very special way parents love and care for their offspring. Look at plants first. One single plant will take great care to create and protect its fruit, filling it with both seeds and required nutrition. That fruit will never be able to repay anything back to the parent plant, but will surely take equal care of its own fruit. This is true for mankind too. No matter what we do, we can never repay our parents for what they have done for us in their lives. And if you are learning from nature, you will know how to love them back and take care of them all you can, without trying to repay any of theirs. For the love we got from them is meant for us to learn from and then pay it forward to our own children.

So it really feels nice to know that such a beautiful concept lies awake in action right around us, if only we make the effort to notice. No wonder they say There's no place like home!!

Sanskar : bed-spread or blind-fold?

2006-01-15T14:08:00.000-05:00

"Sanskar" - an Indian word for the sense of culture. Something you cannot learn off books alone, but that which needs to evolve within yourself through your belief and practice. And most often, this sense of sanskar is passed on through generations via preachings from elders to the younger. If one's belief in one's culture holds strong, it can act as a "bed-spread" (for the lack of a better word) on which one can live one's life comfortably. However, if one fails to comprehend the true essence of the cultural acts, and only concentrates on re-enactment, that same sense may act as a "blind-fold".

Evolution is one of the most natural phenomenon observed freely in the world around us. Millions of years have passed since the first cell ever split on this planet, and now we walk on it proudly. However, when it comes to the evolution of the mind, things are not that easy anymore. And this can have an adverse effect on one's true interpretation of one's culture.

I do believe in good culture and admit it as an essential intrument in one's proper upbringing. However, if within the process of engulfing an young mind with cultural practices, there is no sense of reasoning or no urge to judge the temporal and spatial appropriateness of it, then it may actually be harmful. I feel that it is only prudent that one sees past the apparent practices and makes an effort to fully realize the true essence of one's culture. And then it may be possible to practice it even more efficiently in ways different than those preached, that may be more suitable to the present time and place.

For example I have seen people pray infront of their idol of faith with their eyes closed and hands clasped together in front. And I have also seen parents urging their yound kids to do the same. It is possible that by closing the eyes you are less prone to worldly distraction, thereby being able to concentrate better on what you believe in... and maybe the posture with the clapsed hands follows some pranayam that leads to effectively lower your body's energy, thereby having a calming effect on your mind. So if I were to analyze this act of worship in such a manner, I would realize that the true essence of this particular act is to first "concentrate" and second be "calm". Given this, I would know that if I am sitting alone and am able to concentrate even with my eyes open, and that if by sitting in a padmasana say I can still lower my body's energy, then that apparently different act of worship would have the same effect as the one described before.

More importantly, if one is not open to such an analysis but is only habituated to learning the cultural practices as they percolate down through generations, they may feel utterly helpless in circumstances other than that they are familiar with. For instance if one's sole faith is bound to praying infront of an idol in a temple for example, then when stranded in a place without one, it may lead one to feel lost and desperate, even though it may be possible to attain a sense of direction by simple meditation which can be done almost anywhere. This is where I feel culture and/or tradition can blind you, if you yourself do not take care to keep your mind open and ask "why".

I'll end with a simple and relevant story I had heard. A young girl was learning to cook fried fish from her mom. Her mom showed her how to clean the fish and then remove the scales. Then she cut off the head and the tail leaving only a small portion of the middle section on the large frying pan. When the girl asked her mom why such a large portion of the fish got wasted, her mom informed her that it was exactly how she was taught by her own mother. Intrigued by this, the girl went and asked her grandmother. Surprisingly, her grandmother gave her a similar reply, saying that her own mother had always instructed her to do it that way. Fortunately, her grandmother's mother (grand nanny) still lived to be a healthy old lady. So this young girl went and asked her about it. When her grand nanny heard about this, she just shook her head and replied - "The frying pans were much smaller those days and thats the only way the cleaned fish would fit into it!!"

The Nomadic...

2005-12-15T09:18:00.000-05:00

"No one can keep me tied for long....like the sand dunes, i shift and re-invent myself with every caress of a sandstorm...i realized, that is the key to staying sane and avoiding being hurt...for nothing lasts foreover....not even love...."

I do not agree with the above school of thought. In one of my earlier posts I had already mentioned that disagreeing with someone does not necessarily also indicate a closed mind to that person, so I thought I should be clear once more on that. I can understand and accept someone believing in "changing forms", but I fail to see the point of it.

Remember, that no matter how big or small the sandstorms of life may be... they may easily change your apparent form, but not your true identity which shall still lie within the small grains of sand. In my line of thought, I can view the sand dunes and its ever changing form as our "frame of mind", and the sand grains as our "self consciousness". So what life deals out for us only imprints the mind frame, but to have an effect on the self would need a profound understanding of the self itself. So I guess it depends on whether you wish to focus "without" or "within"... as all the storms only pass on the surface, and the deeper you go the calmer you can be.

Now the second part about "avoid being hurt". I really do not know if that is indeed sane, or in fact really insane. Although happiness is duly searched by almost everyone alive (and dead maybe, havent been there yet), I find sorrow and grief to be far more compelling and intense. In fact, through history "hurt" has proven to be more of a fuel for creativity (music, plays), destruction (wars) and many more things that have brought forth many years of development in more ways than one. I would be really insane to walk through life without having seen the color of "hurt", but that is just my school of thought. I am not saying I love to get hurt. Just that I am open to my fair share of what my tailor made life has in store for me. And to that, I do not wish avoid anything.

"Nothing lasts forever". Well, once again it depends on one's definition of "thing" as well as one's notion of "forever". Ofcourse, if you are talking about biological beings as "things", and your lifetime as "forever", nothing will ever last forever :) But if you refer to the pair of your "soul" and "eternity", well then its still lasting, isnt it? And I feel its the presence of things at appropriate times which is more crucial than the effect of it lasting a while. Everything does happen for a reason. And if you are only going to evaluate the significance of something based on its "last-ablity", then I think you are missing the point. You may have gone through a relationship that turned sour on you. But in that if you fail to remember the good times you shared, then I think you have the tendency to rush through life, trying best to take account of what you have, and what is going to stay, instead of enjoying the ride, that will never last forever.

And if you are indeed hurt by someone else, or by other circumstances of life, the best way to calm yourself is to try and rationalize with yourself your true definition of happiness (as it varies from person to person), and then focus only on achieving that.

"Being happy doesnt mean that the world is perfect; It just means that you have chosen to see beyond imperfection" - Unknown.

Whats this racket...

2005-12-13T08:30:00.000-05:00

Imagine you are sitting in a room with a tin roof, and its raining incessantly. Sometimes it is soft and soothing even, but sometimes its loud and scary. Every now and then, add a couple of thunders too. And this room is in the middle of an African rain forest, where people around do not even speak your language. And they humor you, and try to cuddle you, and essentially treat you like a toy capable of laughable antics.

No. You are not a prisoner of war. Neither are you an African science project (if there exists such a thing)... nor are you about to be offered to God as a human sacrifice. You are, in fact, just a baby.

I read this in an article in Reader's Digest several years back, and somehow since I was writing about babies in my last post, I felt like including this small factoid here too. Ofcourse, for new parents, much of this may be old news. But my role here is that of awakening consciousness... and so this is mostly for people who are uninitiated about such facts.

In my earlier scenario, just replace the tin roof with the baby's eardrums, and the rain with all the noise around (note that it includes our voices too, as words without meaning are nothing but noise). I read that when you speak to a baby, your voice corresponds to a different sounding rain drop falling on that tin roof. Now if its nice and soft, like a plitter platter, the baby smiles. Not because the baby thinks you are the next brad pitt/princess diane, but just because the baby likes the sound of your voice! Alarmingly simple, isnt it? And since the baby hears his/her mother's soft voice the most, it will always find that voice the most soothing (ofcourse, once baby grows up to a kid and mom has to shout all the time its a whole new story meritting I guess a whole new blog post :) ).

So next time you go see a baby and you are all "goo-goo, ga-ga" with it, remember that you will need many years of unlearning to speak that language again, but at least if you can be soft and tender, there are more chances of that priceless giggle over that blasting baby siren!

And even if that siren does sound, dont take it personally. Blame it all on that African rainforest thingy ;)

The way of learning... is by forgetting

2005-12-10T09:00:00.000-05:00

No, it is not a paradox. And I did not come to this brilliant conclusion while soaking in a hot water bath, and so neither did I run naked down the streets of Buffalo, NY.

I simply read it in an article on child psychology. It suggested that a baby's mind does not differentiate between ideas or concepts, and that all is equal to it at first. So the whole world is possible - is both sense and non-sense (whose intercourse by the way, as posted on a dear friend's blog, leads to the orgasm called laughter!). Now every child is surrounded by other learned individuals (also referred to occassionally as "adults"), who by virtue of their infinite wisdom, choose to inflict only a certain train of thoughts on this baby. The true process of learning as we know it then begins, when this baby starts associating with only these selected thoughts, and slowly "learns" to stop admitting anything else. For example, at start, every sound is the same, and has absolutely the same meaning to a baby - NONE! Then slowly, the alphabets of a language are spelled out meticulously, and the language is spoken all the time, associated with suggestive actions. Thus the baby quickly learns to communicate in that specific medium in order to get the required response. In other words, the baby forgets all that was initially possible, and only remembers what is deemed important at that juncture. And while we jump with joy (err, not me in particular) when the baby speaks its first few words, the baby may smile too.. for it may feel utterly victorious at being able to master this overtly complicated method of expressing the simplest of all emotions.

And this is the not the only instance where we can "create" through a process of "destruction". A more formal name to this specific art is called "sculpting". You take a block of stone (the untamed mind) and you take a hammer and a chisel and you chip away (training your thoughts) till you get a form you appreciate (your frame of mind). In more spititual context, one can "learn" to heal, if one can "forget" one's hurt.

By now I guess you get the idea :)

You need only one...

2005-12-09T21:37:00.000-05:00

I was walking out of my lab after having submitted a paper to a conference (on which I was working on for past 3 months), when suddenly this guy near our student union saw me and pointed to a poster which said that there was a band playing in SU Theatre. The name of the band was "Holy Fire" and he said its rock. Being a sucker for any kind of live music really, I thought what could be better.

As I settled down in the theatre, there was this guy who had just finished one song and had started to talk a bit. Soon, I realized that it was Christian rock! Where, they sing the praise of the lord. Now, as I am always open to new views, I decided to stay there for a while and listen, and decided to leave after hearing at least one song.

The guy went on talking for quite some time. He was basically elaborating on how most of us are engrossed with mundane things around ourselves, and maybe missing out on the very point of life (which I have no idea about anyway!!). And his solution, and our salvation, was to believe in Christ. He was asking people to not merely believe in Christ, but to cling on to him as a parachute, when in a plane that was about to crash, so that you would not trade in that belief (parachute) for anything at all.

Nice motivation, but narrow scope. It is good that at least he is making people aware of their problems. But it is not fair that he puts forth the notion of following Christ as the only way to salvation.

At that moment, I could not help but feel at peace with myself. I was thinking, that no matter what part of this world you are from, we all respond to the same set of emotions as human beings. But we differ in our expressions, our languages, our gestures maybe. Similarly, by virtue of being alive, we are filled with the same spirit, soul, consciousness. Although we choose to follow different relegions. So I was feeling at peace with myself because I realized that I need (and do believe in) only one... the "self".. to fill me.. and not be distracted by many... these different paths to salvation. After all there is only one god, no matter what relegion you follow. So why not feel happy with one "faith" in spiritualism. This helps me to focus.

On a side note, he was asking people not to be selfish. To take note of the sufferings of people around. But as per my concept of self, if I am poised in my realization of self, I was wondering how it would still be possible to take note of what is going around.

After talking to an esteemed friend, it was made clear to me that one of the central concepts of Geeta is not only to be calm and poised within self, but to also be a sink, for all the turbulence around to come hit you, and end within you. So the trick is to stay calm "within" all the chaos, and not live without it all. And since every mass has a wave of energy around it, you will emanate this calming effect on whoever comes close. It seems that once you attain the true knowledge of self, it shall become your inevitable duty to be there for all others to know from you.

Anyway, as long as we realize the need to converge into one, we can surely trust to reach the same place, no matter which path we follow.

Which is bigger: Universe or Nucleus?

2005-10-03T13:39:00.000-04:00

The journey from the Milky Way (left) to a Nucleus (right), is just an eternal recursion !

Be unreasonable

2005-10-01T21:42:00.000-04:00

I often wonder at people, who tend to cling on to their known social groups a bit too ardently. And I guess you notice this thing more, if you are out if it. For instance, have you ever been to a party with a friend where you dont know anyone except your friend. And as you see your friend quickly dissolve himself into his known environment, you struggle to break into that "circle of trust" ? Even if you are prepared to brave the awkardness of breaking the ice, there are at times a group of people who are not willing to include a new person that easily. Ofcourse, one simple reason is that at times it is too much effort from their part to maybe explain all that is relevant to them, and hence too laborious a task to include a stranger.

But I have also often noticed this in scenarios which are far more long term than a party which maybe lasts only a few hours. In office spaces, schools, or any other places where people may meet socially as a routine, you shall always find social cliques.

In my school itself, I find most Asians sticking together in their respective ethnic groups, even where we have the oportunity to be exposed to people from all over the world. True, time may be scarce to socialize when you go to grad school. Yet, that doesnt stop us from having fun within ourselves. Only, we dont include anything in our daily routine that may involve us including others in our groups. Again, one simple reason is that we find that we can relate to, and agree with, and share points of view more readily with people from similar social backgrounds.

Now here is what I think. If we all find that special group of people to agree with, we shall no doubt find great harmony, where everyone adapts themselves to each other. With harmony, shall come peace and tranquility, no more questions as to why and how. And with that, the entropy in this universe will lower down, and our entire universe as we know it will come to a standstill ! It is equivalent to saying that every mass is able to lower its potential energy to the minimum, and thereby there is no more will to generate kinetic energy, and thus no more movement.

And here is what George Bernard Shaw thinks: "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man."

Need I say more?

Arguments can help - my point of view

2005-09-28T21:07:00.000-04:00

I always compared points of view to color. When I say I have a point of view, what I mean is that there is this colored transparent sheet in front of my eyes. And as we all duly learnt (unless you were sleeping through) in our high school physics classes, we see things as a result of light falling on them and getting reflected back to our eyes. However, if we have a colored filter, only light of specific wavelengths (also can be called as color) manages to get through. Thus, what we see, and how we see it, depends on what we allow ourselves to see through our point of view.

When we have a conversation, we often express our ways of looking into life and the world. Thus we present our points of view. Now, if two people in a conversation hold similar points of views, they shall find it extremely easy to communicate effectively, since both see similar things through their own color filters. However, if they differ in opinion, they are each painting a version of reality as they see it. Alas, we know reality to be a big illusion. So, each of them feel completely lost in understanding the existence of the other's world. Thus, they feel compelled to deny it and enter an argument.

However, if we decide to trust the fact that another person's point of view may exist, in all its differences, just becuase ours does, and we dare to embrace the new school of thought, however bizzare it may seem, without giving up our own, we would in effect be adding their color to ours in the filter. As a result, the number of wavelegths of light that we shall admit will increase, and we will have a wider perspective on things in life!

Now I must clarify here that by admitting another person's differing point of view, I am not suggesting we agree to that view or give up our own thoughts about the subject of discussion. What I am refering to is a code of agreement to disagree, and acknowledging the existence of the differing point of view.

If we ponder on the possibilities of what this might lead to, we will see that we have the opportunity to widen our point of view whenever we meet someone who thinks different from us. And if we ever manage to meet with all the people who could ever possibly think any different from us, what do you think would happen? Our color filter would have a mix of every possible color.. and we would see white, or see things as they truly are, or come to realize the ultimate truth and visualize the reality of life!! Is that the light at the end of the tunnel people with near death experience mention? The light which seems to answer all their queries, because nothing is hidden any more ?

Who knows... I guess I still have a guzillion arguments to face before I can answer that one! So what are you waiting for? :)

Old folks need to learn new tricks!

2005-09-25T18:57:00.000-04:00

Somehow, in most traditional cultures, respecting your elders have always been the norm. However, if the other name of "respect" is "strict obedience", I dont buy it at all. Love your elders, care for them, hold their hand when they need it, but dont simply obey them because they happen to have been around for longer than you. At the same time, I am not advocating the opinion that we should never respect our elders. All I am saying is that like in everything else, we should exercise our right to discretion.

If we wish to explore the origin of this almost religious practice, we should observe that in old times, our social environment would stay very close to that of our parents or other elders with whom we would grow up. Thus, all the experience they would have earned through life in that given environment would be a huge source of information and wisdom for us to grow up with and battle the odds of life. Now elders like those would earn my respect, and also my obedience to some level anyday! Because I am not celebrating their age, but their wisdom, which has contemporary value to me.

Unfortunately, the essence of one's wisdom is not absolute, for if it was, one would be hailed as God! And nowadays, we often move on to live our lives in completely different social strata, unknown to our elders. So unless our elders can keep their mind open and let knowledge of new times and new places pour in, and keep experiencing new things in life and learn from it, the old wisdom they already earned may not keep up with the world for long. The truth as I see it: there is life in motion, death in stagnation. As I read somewhere, you do not stop learning the lessons in life because you grow old, but you grow old when you stop learning.

So this is the harsh fact of life - having proved your wisdom once, earns respect one time. But to earn ever lasting respect from new people of changing times, old folks would need to display their wisdom over and over again. And if they are really wise, it should not be difficult for them to realize that more often than not, they would have to start respecting the experience in youngers, that can at times help them from succumbing to the challenges of a new world.

Mind Games

2005-07-28T20:56:00.000-04:00

This mind is one crafty thing. Interestingly, its always chattering away, like its got a life of its own, and if we are able to really observe it silently, we are fully aware of it. Even now, as I write, its like a whole being by itself, and I am tossing phrases back and forth with it, before I pen them down. I have already posted my feelings about the mind and its place in the hierarchy of things within us. Ofcourse, my mind is still growing, and so my opinons are bound to grow along with it in due time. This post however, is just to marvel at the power of the mind to do absolute magic... that would make even Houdini seem like a mere novice. Or was it not the mind itself that was instrumental in all of his acts?

I was sitting with a doctor friend of mine, who in his spare time (which is quite rare I can assure you) indulges his own mind in the quest of the absolute truth! We were talking of things in general, when he asks me to look at him. Then he asks me to close my eyes.. and I did. We sat there silently for around 2 minutes.

Hmm.. so much for silence.. but did you note the assumption I made in the last sentence above? I said "we" sat there silently for around 2 minutes. To be honest, I can tell you that I did, and as for my friend, I can only assume that he did. Ofcourse, when I opened my eyes he was still there, but that is hardly proof of his existence for the 2 minutes when I could not see him for sure. So where am I headed with all these?

Look. Its pretty simple really. I see him.. he exists. But even when I dont, he does.. in my mind. That was my assumption. At the same time, if you enter a dark room, even if there is someone in there, whom you cant see, he wont exist for you (in your mind, or otherwise) unless you "know", which translates into a "recording by the mind". So, our entire world, as it seems to exist right in front of us, is nothing but a figment of our imagination... which would in turn mean that "reality" equals "imaginary"! Phew!!

In accordance to my former post "My Self, My Mind, and I", this is the way I perceive it. Since the mind and the senses are always "alive", the senses keep feeding the mind, which keeps recording. And then when the senses have nothing to report, the mind is still capable of churning up images from our memory for you to "see"... images so real that you wont know the difference.. why else do you think when we dream, we never seem to think that its not real! In fact, out there in dream land the mind is able to create a whole new world for us. And we seem to exist there quite normally. Isnt that the neatest trick ever? The magic of the mind.

So this actually opens up a whole new direction of thinking.. if all that is.. is only because we think it is, what does "real" mean? Well, I guess we can only search for that answer in one place.. inside our mind!

Blinded by the Light

2005-07-19T16:16:00.000-04:00

As darkness embraced me in powerful arms,
I was frightened beyond all known norms...
My senses eluded me in a mist of despair
I stumbled, I hurt, but had lost all care.
My soul screamed in a deafening silence,
Trying to focus on the midnight cadence
All I hoped for was a meager ray of light
To which my reality could cling on tight.

With time I knew this night would stay
I settled down to hear what it had to say.
It was then that I learnt of the simple way,
See through appearances in the light of day.
I could see all for what they really are
No more deceit from near and from far.
Dawned upon me then, my true sight
All along, I was just blinded by the light.

I had written this poem sometime back, in an effort to pen down my thoughts about our inner sight, and how we may use it to see through things as they "seem" to appear. Light, in its inability to penetrate deep within, fails to show us what lies beneath. And if we are too quick to form our own impressions, we shall be stuck with the apparent vision of the outside, ignorant of the inside. I felt like posting it here, as its relevant to this blog, but shall leave further analysis to the reader.

My Self, My Mind, and I

2005-07-18T10:34:00.000-04:00

No, this is not a review of any sequel to any Jim Carrey movie. I just felt like writing about my self. Not "myself", but just "self". To that, have you ever noticed how we say "My car", "My house", "My life", but "Myself" and not "My self"? We were always taught to write it as one word.. wisdom of the ages... because in the simple equation of life, someone noticed that "My self = Me", so my self and I are not really different, so let it be one word. Fair enough. And we have successfully used that word over and over again without maybe realizing the full strength of it.... assuming that absolute "self-realization" is a phenomenon not often observed in mere mortals like you and I ! (and if you believe yourself to be the enlightened one, please note that I hold you in my highest regard and would welcome all you would have to add to what I am about to say :) )

And no, I wasn't struck by thunder and no, I didn't realize self... in fact, far from it. But even before we start realizing something, I believe we need to be aware of, and be willing to accept its existence. And yes, I have recently been aware of the existence of self. To give credit where its due, apart from my ever inquisitive and pondering mind, it all started when my friend's mother (who has become like my spiritual guide) asked me simply "How would you define who you are?". Hmm... what do you mean? I am joy!! I belong to the most dangerous species on this planet... I am involved in scholarly activites.. and blah blah blah. True... except that these are all "about" me. Then, who am i? I can feel it... its the same feeling I had of "myself" when I was 10 yrs old and I was learning to gracefully fall off the bike, the same one I had when I was 18 and was rushing to get my license to speed... the same one when I started college, and the same one when I went off to work. That feeling of self never changed really, for I was never really a stranger to myself. All that did change however, was how I appeared physically, my surroundings and my circumstances. But I had no words to describe that feeling of self... except to call it my "consciousness". Ahh... now we are getting into another beautiful and over used and seldom fathomed word.. "consciousness".

If I hit you hard enough over the head, I can make you unconscious :) Not that I want to, but it is interesting how most people comprehend "unconsciousness" better than "consciousness". If you are unconscious... you are most probably lying like a vegetable.. and its easy for us to take note of. But if you are conscious, we dont care... for we all are and you are no different. So we choose to take our abundant consciousness for granted. But our consciousness is exactly that feeling of self that we have had from the moment we were born, till date. Only that we are not always aware of it fully. So armed with this new awareness of our consciousness, we can now boldly reply "I am my consciousness, my self".

A 17th century French philospher called Rene Descartes once said: "I think, therefore I am". I found an interesting article on this by Marie T. Russell, the publisher of InnerSelf Magazine. (http://www.innerself.com/Reflections/i_think.htm). I "think". Where and how? In fact, I can always experience a non-stop chattering of thoughts in my mind. "My mind"... and as soon as I say it as two separate words, the ardent reader jumps up in joy and says.."there you go.. that clearly means that My Mind is not equal to Me!!". Yes, its been said that the first step toward the path of self realization is the disassociation of "My Mind" and "I". We say "I" think... how? by using "My Mind". So the mind doesnt think on its own, for it doesnt have any consciousness like I do. But I can make it think, and can choose to listen to what it has to say. So its no different from any of the other senses I posses really. After having thought about it (I can literally analyze my mind using my mind... crazy istnt it? :) ) I came up with this picture for my own gratification to explain the order of things within me.

So this is how I see it. Forgive my standing as a computer engineer in viewing everything as either a "processing unit" or an "input output stream", but you will see that it may make perfect sense to you too :) So the main purpose or motivation behind all the things that happen within me, is me. Thats pretty simple right? I want to hear, see, think, etc., so I do. Now, I am enodwed with these 5 amazing organs sensing 5 different things for me (will let you know when I have the 6th!). But you have to admit, that each organ sensing a particular category of feed, is not intelligent enough to interpret it. Moreover, unless you physically block them (shutting of eyelid, placing your hand over your ear), these organs continue to "sense" life long, all the time. But all this data streaming in, is absolutely raw, unrefined, and unprocessed. That is precisely where my mind plays a signifcant role. My mind is like the central processor (or interpretor), and also the main memory bank. And like the organs, its working incessanlty, with only I having the power to control it if I so wish.

So here it goes. Lets take our hearing for example. The ear picks up a noise... passes it to the mind... the mind matches the noise with those stored in our memory banks to find a match. If found, its interpreted with an associated meaning (which is nothing but a feeling for the soul) and passed on to the soul so that we can once more "feel" that meaning. If its not matched, its ignored as noise and our soul doesnt react. This is why (as stated in my previous post) we seldom react violently, when cursed in greek or latin (as being examples of languages you are not aware of)... simply because we never learnt to associate any meaning with those words in our mind. And that is what we have been doing ever since we were born.. "learning", or in other words, mapping meanings or feelings to all that we sense and storing it in our memory so that we can interpret them in future. Ofcourse, there are ways and means we adopt as humans to learn as compared to other animamls, but that merits a separate post of its own.

So if all is well in wonderworld, what is the need to know or even think about it? Well, the main issue is to deal with our "frame of mind", and its power over our self. Often, we tend to associate our selves too closely with what we think. But then we have to realize that it is "we" that are in control of how we choose to react to all our thoughts, not the other way around... simply because our thoughts "belong" to us.. they "are" not us. Where does the frame of mind fit in? Lets take another example. Someone slaps you in the face (err.. ok by now you know of my affinity for the extremes! but it just helps prove a point better). The skin senses the touch and forwards signals to the mind, indicating the pressure on skin. The mind scoops out prior events of similar pressures on skin (assuming you did get an occasional beating or two in your childhood) and remembers the feeling of hurt or pain. This feeling is passed on to the soul for you to be "conscious" of that emotion. But the mind doesnt stop at that. Not only does it record inputs from the organs along with their mapped interpretations, but it also records your past reactions to these events. Thus, if as a child your reaction to this would be a spontaneous outburst of flying fists and lunging legs aimed at your adversary, this time too, the mind is surely going to "suggest" (strongly) similar responses to you. This is our frame of mind. Our point of view. The obvious mapping of the input senses to the output reactions. Here is where we say we need to exercise "self control".. the control of the self over mind in establishing fresh course of action, in place of blindly following prior ones. And that is why we say that we may always change our frame of mind, and broaden our point of view, but we are never going to change our selves.

Going back to our last example of hearing things, have you ever noticed that if you are reading a novel while sitting infront of the TV, and are trying real hard to concentrate on the book, you lose track of what is playing on the TV, even if its still on? Well, here is what happens. The ear as usual picks up all the auditory signals emitted from the TV and passes it to the mind. The mind duly interprets it and passes it to you. But at the same time, your eyes too are seeing the text in the book and passing that information to the mind, which is processing it and passing it on to you. So now you are getting two inputs from the mind, but since you wish to focus only on what you see and not on what you hear, you tell your mind to stop processing the auditory signals. Thus, those signals slowly fade away into arbitrary background noises and is not processed or stored in memory for later recall. Simple isnt it.. and most of us may have exercised this control of self over mind on many occasions, without delving into the intricacies of it all.

And to think, that if we can keep our ears open and block the processing of the auditory signals, what amazing concentration we could have if we could keep our eyes open and still stop seeing things infront.. or only see what we wish to see (like in mahabharata, young arjuna was known to have focussed on the eye of the bird so hard that he would not see anything else around). Those however, as I said at the beginning, are effects of gradually increasing levels of self realization. But, as long as we are at least aware of the differences between My self, My mind and I, we already have a good start.

The words of a MAN

2005-07-15T14:12:00.000-04:00

The power of words were never more evident than in the ways a "boy" leverages it on his way to becoming a "MAN". I can vouch for this having walked down similar alley myself... although I never could fathom the necessity of it all.

I attended a co-education school, which simply stated hosted both boys and girls in the same class. Although, such a concept in the western world is quite preliminary, in the eastern part I think it was one of the two choices, where same-sex schools were in abundance. Anyway, as far as I can remember, our adolescence came around the time we were in our 6th grade.. (yeah.. there used to be a time when 5th graders would not know about the birds and the bees!!) and the first signs of it.. apart from the sudden realization that we felt somewhat different about the girls in our class, came the new lessons learnt in spoken languages.

Curses, slangs, local lingos, abuses.. suddenly there was a whole new vocabulary of the Macho MAN.. without which you would be a social outcast. And the most unfortunate part of it all was that most of it related to something with a sexual connotation to it... after all it was a brand new concept then. And no wonder I come from a society enslaved for many decades with the notion of male domination.. for how on earth would we expect boys slipping into the shoes of such a MAN to view women with true respect. There are always exceptions, but they seldom represent the society as a whole. But let me not digress from the main topic of discussion here.

Power of words. Not all words though.. but only those that signify something with which we associate certain strong feelings... be it courage or shame... something that stirrs us up emotionally. But then who has this power? The MAN who speaks ofcourse. But over whom? Now this is an intersting question. Only over people who choose to associate those above mentioned feelings to the words being spoken.. for how often would you be intimidated by someone cursing you in greek or latin? But once again... this posting is not primarily about the use of strong language.. but its association with some popularly accepted notion of MAN-hood.. that never ceased to amaze me.

Its not difficult to understand a human being's craving to excel. Being competetive can actually be healthy. So of two people, if both would want to do something in particular, and only one of them succeeds... then that establishes a feeling of supremacy. And this is true of all sexes. So where does the use of strong language fit in? Well as I mentioned, in certain societies like mine, girls grew up with certain concepts of "social taboo" in life... which unfortunately related mostly to their biological developments, and hence also sexual in some sense of that word. On the other hand, boys went scott free. So its easy to see how, long time back when I was still in my 6th grade, between a boy and a girl of the same age, going through adolescence together, it was easier for the boy to deliver certain phrases that could put the girl at discomfort. Thus came the realization of the new taste of mascularity and the "power" of speech that came along with it. And this power was not necessarily wielded over girls alone. Any and all boys still unable to practice the art of MAN grammar were not deemed MAN enough.

However, I myself could never really understand the need of it all. Fortunately for me, I was a school prefect, and so was spared the open wrath of the young MEN in our class, but at the same time I was excluded from their "Grown Up" meetings and jokes and conversations held during the break sitting at the rear of the class, or in shady corners of the campus. Not that it ever bothered me too much, since I had an assortment of close friends who stood the same ground as me. Nevertheless, I can surely attribute this sense of MAN-hood surrounding the utterance of strong and abusive language to adolescence. But imagine my surprise when I find years later, that those pseudo-MEN just refused to grow up! Even now, in many MEN, I observe this same pattern of strong verbal expressiveness being offered in a pretext of their so called MAN-hood. I guess they have been blinded for so long that they find it hard to see it anyway else.

So is there no hope for our future generation "boys" to take time to turn into true "men" instead of rushing into the same path of violent languages? Well ofcourse there is. In the modern day, the stance of our society has changed a lot towards women. So what was a social taboo then, may not be today. So where does that lead us? Well, when the "boy" delivers his first strong verbal statement to the "girl", hes faced with an equally strong rebuttal, which is far removed from the shy expressions of long past. There you go. If strong words can be wielded by both sexes in equal, the power of it shall no more remain a priviledge of the "Macho MAN" now would it?

Why (not) me?

2005-07-13T13:27:00.000-04:00

There are always two sides to a coin. Ofcourse, you knew that already... after all its not all that rocket science... but you may not have pondered on the full implication of that simple statement in all that happens to us in our day to day life. For example, when something unexpected, and maybe not so pleasant thing happens to us in our personal lives... more often than not our initial reaction to that is "Why me?". Well.. what can I say.. if not me.. then who else? I am sure we are not wishing someone else something bad here... and at the same time.. bad must happen.. for good to be balanced. Its the simple universal and eternal truth :)

So what could be a good way to deal with our momentary pangs of frustration... those dark sulky hours when we dont seem to make any fair and justified sense out of anything. We feel victimized, for in our book, we did nothing to deserve it. Well.. one way to battle these odds is with patience.. a virtue learnt only the hard way in life. We can keep in mind that the mysteries of life and all its events are not so visible always and that we have to be patient for it to unfold for our full comprehension. So if it was indeed "me", then it was by choice, and not by accident... and I need to wait to understand "why".

Coming back to my initial comment on the duality of events, on the other side of all this hurt and confusion is the opportunity we get to live through new experiences. A point to note here is that all our lives are tailor-made for us.. along with all its highs and lows. And when its the unexpected "pleasant" moments in life.. we dont run around looking for explainations.. do we? We simply smile and accept, take a bow and leave it at that with a warm feeling of complacency. Interestingly however, in most general cases there are more valuable lessons hidden in the "hard" experiences than the "feel good" ones. And these lessons are what prepares us for dealing with other things in life far better than we could before, making us better human beings maybe. So in a way, we could almost be grateful that things do happen to us, even if we fail to understand and accept them as they do... for we do change not by time, but solely by our living experiences.

So the minute we are hit with the "Why me" trauma... I say flip the coin... sing the "Why not me" song.. and rejoice the fact that your life has just been touched, and made richer and fuller with this new experience, than it was before.

Living life L"a"terally

2005-07-11T22:45:00.000-04:00

If you have ever been told by someone "try to orient yourself in life in the right direction".. or something to that effect... please raise your hand :) Well, you dont really have to take me literally here.. but I have often wondered if life really has a direction. I mean does life really go forward, or upward, or for that matter if you think of in space.. what does a specific direction mean anyway? And in that regard, our existence itself is said to span many different dimensions. Then which way are we supposed to orient ourselves ?

From the time we are born, the clock's been ticking. So to account for that inevitability, we console our mind by sketching up the notion of "moving forward" in life. For after all, if we are not moving in some direction, and still not find ourselves where we used to be, then frankly it wouldnt make much sense now would it? I had read a quotation by Rudyard Kipling: "It isnt time thats passing by my friend, its You and I". So resting on the wisdom of great philosophers, we can safely assume that we are definitely moving.. although maybe not necessarily forward or upward as most of us would like to believe.

The way I see it is we are literally moving laterally. If you can imagine yourself floating on the surface of a gigantic ocean, drifting from point to point, then u may realize that we can measure our movement with respect to relative distances, instead of any specific direction. This ocean, as I call it, is the plane of existence that we are so familiar with. As we are born, we come to exist at a certain point within this giant ocean, and most likely we are bound within this plane for our entire lifetime. So what about our movement? Well.. its like we are cruising from point to point either in search of knowledge, or truth, or some other mundane counterpart of the same.

When I was small, I once had a conversation with the cleaning man in our apartment regarding the importance of a good education. Working for some Rs. 10,000 a year, he used to tell me "study hard and become an engineer and then u will earn Rs. 10,000 in a month!!".. with an expression that would clearly display his feelings of awe surrounding that level of monetary income. Years passed, I studied (didnt have many choices too) and I worked.. and needless to say lived life much more comfortably than what that man had ever dreamed of... if not for himself.. but for me. So who moved? Him or me? True, I grew up vertically.. if thats the kind of direction you are looking for... but in life.. apart from being able to say that I did for a fact move far far away from him, can I really say if I "rose" higher than him, or that he was left behind? For what is "behind" us anyway? If you are looking at the time line, yes, if hes still alive he may be in my past, but hes definitely the present of someone else right now. So I am not really ahead of him right? We still exist in the same plane.. only sideways!

And as far as society's need for him and for me.. I would not be able to comment at all about who is needed more. So there goes the notion of one being "above" the other too. So besides the fact that he may still be floating in the same place and I drifted apart, the movement in my life so far.. as see it... is only lateral. And thats how I think I will continue to drift.. as long as I live.

Myths about Astrology

2005-07-11T16:19:00.000-04:00

I searched on the web for some text on similar title... but not finding any decided to write something myself. Whatever I write is bounded my limited knowledge of the heavenly affairs and should be construed as my personal opnion only.

Astrology seems to be very popular amongst many people all around the world. Come to think of it, its not so unexpected as it speaks of planets and their possible influence on our mundane lives. I am sure there will be very few who shall not be tempted by the promise of a glimpse into the future. However, I believe that just like any other subject of science, astrology too should be strictly observed through a scientifically tuned mind. We should try and understand first what it really means, before we start interpreting it, for unless we know what the domain we are focussing on realy is, there will always be a million inferences.

I read on a site online (http://www.chartplanet.com/html/natal_charts.html) that in Astrology, "Natal Charts" (or Birth Charts) are much different from "Horoscopes". While horoscopes typically consider only the position of the Sun, natal charts includes much more data involving the positions of the planets and astrological houses in the sky at the moment of birth. According to that site:
"Analyzing the planetary positions and relationships in a natal chart affords a remarkably profound and revealing glimpse into your natural character, with its inherent strengths and weaknesses. Among other things, your natal chart will tell you: A) what type of partner and relationship you seek and will be best matched with, B) what type of job or career your natural strengths and weaknesses are best suited for, and C) obstacles that need to be overcome in your life. Most importantly, your natal chart will help you to understand your desires, motivations, and why you are the way that you are."

So what does all this really mean? Does this mean that once we read our natal charts and realize who we are and what we want, we have nothing else to learn from the experiences in our lives? Does it really provide us with a strict guideline to life.. urging us to adopt particular relations or specific jobs?

Well I think its really tough to answer these things in a simple way. The first thing I observe is that the natal charts do not really perform any magic. If its only supposed to tell us about our own personality, we can observe that ourselves if we care to meditate and walk through a process of self realization. Moreover, if we are always true to our hearts, we would fall in love with a person or career that best suits our natural personality. So in that respect, we would not really have to depend on our natal charts to any great amount. All we would need to be is honest, not only with others but mostly with ourselves.

The second thing of importance in my opinion is our perspective. In general, both good and bad is relative to one's point of view. Given that, even if we come to know about some future event through our natal charts, and decide to accept it as inevitable, we shall still have limited idea about our reaction to that event till it actualy occurs. I have read "Pain is inevitable, but suffering is not". So, it is possible that the manner in which we perceive the future event now, may be different from the way we perceive it in future, because of potential changes in our points of view as we walk through life and its bizarre experiences. Also, sometimes the first impression of an event may not be the only one. For example, if a party plans on a picnic in the forest, but the weather predicts rain, they could still go prepared for a rain dance in the middle of the forest and have fun anyway. True, such predictions may help us be better prepared to face unfriendly events, but in the end we still do have a say in how we shall end up dealing with it when it actually happens.

If this were not true, would you not be going in for a job interview with your natal charts along with your resume? After all, if its in your destiny to work there, how can you ever get rejected? So I think what we need is to be cautious of the way we interpret the science of astrology. On one hand, we can take inputs from it and be better prepared, but on the other hand, we should never leave faith in ourselves to be able to live in the moment and build a part of our destiny on the way.